(no subject)

One of the people I deal with in Marketing died Thursday. She was 20 weeks pregnant with twin boys; I don't know the details, but it sounds like the fetuses died, she went in for a D&C, and her heart stopped. She had a husband and a 3 year old daughter. She was 38. I didn't know her well, but it's still pretty awful.

They had a "non-denominational" service in the chapel in the building this morning. I was a little worried about what they might mean by non-denominational, but I wanted to go to pay my respects. Big mistake. As soon as I walked into the chapel, past the bowls of holy water and into the room filled with candles and crucifixes, I started to get uncomfortable. A priest came in wearing a collar and a white robe, which did not make me feel any better. He led a moment of silence and then a prayer ending with something about Christ.

By then I was starting to cry, not because of Tomoko's death, but because I was so uncomfortable. He announced that they would read from the Gospels, and I got up and ran for it. Luckily I was seated on the end of a row on the side of the chapel, so I think my exit was reasonably discreet, but I still feel kind of bad about it. I didn't want people to think I didn't care, but it felt so incredibly WRONG to me to be there that I just couldn't take it. I hate to make it about me when it should have been about her, but there just comes a point when you have to take care of yourself. Sigh.

(no subject)

One of the people I deal with in Marketing died Thursday. She was 20 weeks pregnant with twin boys; I don't know the details, but it sounds like the fetuses died, she went in for a D&C, and her heart stopped. She had a husband and a 3 year old daughter. She was 38. I didn't know her well, but it's still pretty awful.

They had a "non-denominational" service in the chapel in the building this morning. I was a little worried about what they might mean by non-denominational, but I wanted to go to pay my respects. Big mistake. As soon as I walked into the chapel, past the bowls of holy water and into the room filled with candles and crucifixes, I started to get uncomfortable. A priest came in wearing a collar and a white robe, which did not make me feel any better. He led a moment of silence and then a prayer ending with something about Christ.

By then I was starting to cry, not because of Tomoko's death, but because I was so uncomfortable. He announced that they would read from the Gospels, and I got up and ran for it. Luckily I was seated on the end of a row on the side of the chapel, so I think my exit was reasonably discreet, but I still feel kind of bad about it. I didn't want people to think I didn't care, but it felt so incredibly WRONG to me to be there that I just couldn't take it. I hate to make it about me when it should have been about her, but there just comes a point when you have to take care of yourself. Sigh.

OK, that was just weird.

I had a date tonight with a guy I met on JDate. I've seen this guy twice before, and it's been pleasant enough, no great sparks or anything. Last time we went out to dinner and then for a walk around the Christian Science reflecting pool. He took my arm while we were walking, and I wasn't entirely comfortable with that but decided to just go along with it. Thinking about it later, I was unhappy with myself for that and decided not to do it again.

So tonight we had dinner and then went to see Lost in Translation (which I really loved. Bill Murray. Who knew?) Early on in the film he reached over to take my hand, and I just pulled it back and shook my head and went back to watching the movie.

The moment the movie was over, before the credits even started rolling, he got up and left the theater without a word. I really like to watch the credits, and I figured maybe he had to pee or something, so I stayed for the credits, then left the theater. No sign of him. Loitered outside the mens room for a few minutes. Nothing. Went to the ladies room myself. Nothing. Asked the people at the concierge desk if they had noticed him. Nope. The guy at the desk went into the bathroom and looked for him. No one there. So I hung around for another few minutes, then hopped on the T and went home.

WTF? Was he mortally offended because I wouldn't hold his hand? Did he expect me to follow him out when he left? Was there a sudden mental telepathy emergency? I don't really care about seeing him again, I'm just curious what would make someone do that.

I want to send him an email, but how do you say "Was there an emergency or are you just a jerk?"

OK, that was just weird.

I had a date tonight with a guy I met on JDate. I've seen this guy twice before, and it's been pleasant enough, no great sparks or anything. Last time we went out to dinner and then for a walk around the Christian Science reflecting pool. He took my arm while we were walking, and I wasn't entirely comfortable with that but decided to just go along with it. Thinking about it later, I was unhappy with myself for that and decided not to do it again.

So tonight we had dinner and then went to see Lost in Translation (which I really loved. Bill Murray. Who knew?) Early on in the film he reached over to take my hand, and I just pulled it back and shook my head and went back to watching the movie.

The moment the movie was over, before the credits even started rolling, he got up and left the theater without a word. I really like to watch the credits, and I figured maybe he had to pee or something, so I stayed for the credits, then left the theater. No sign of him. Loitered outside the mens room for a few minutes. Nothing. Went to the ladies room myself. Nothing. Asked the people at the concierge desk if they had noticed him. Nope. The guy at the desk went into the bathroom and looked for him. No one there. So I hung around for another few minutes, then hopped on the T and went home.

WTF? Was he mortally offended because I wouldn't hold his hand? Did he expect me to follow him out when he left? Was there a sudden mental telepathy emergency? I don't really care about seeing him again, I'm just curious what would make someone do that.

I want to send him an email, but how do you say "Was there an emergency or are you just a jerk?"